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Go, and never darken my towels again.
Groucho Marx Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
Groucho Marx Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
Groucho Marx Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
Groucho Marx Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Gracie Allen Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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You know the hardest thing about having cerebral palsy and being a woman It's plucking your eyebrows. That's how I originally
Geri Jewell Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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If the minimum wasn't acceptable it wouldn't be called the minimum.
George Muncaster Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.
George Carlin Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
George Carlin Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
George Carlin Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.
George Burns Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.
George Burns Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.
George Burns Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.
George Burns Email to a Friend Comments: Add Comments
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It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
